Have you heard of "sweating"? I hadn't, until I stumbled across an article on Fitness Magazine dot com, heralding sweating as the latest wellness craze for its myriad benefits to your body. Apparently, when your body heats up, your pores release a mixture of water, ammonia, and urea to cool you down. Huh! Once again, the human body is a complex, mysterious citadel of delights.

Usually, though, sweating requires exercise, a.k.a. physical labor. (Ew.) Luckily, a couple new places have recently opened up in New York City for aspirational millennials like me to pay for some ammonia release without actually moving. They are saunas, but unlike the traditional saunas you might have been inside, these are more expensive. (And, possibly, more effective. Definitely cooler.) Depending on the budget you've allotted for strange wellness treatments, you too can partake in the sweating. Whether you are a perspiration prince or a shvitzing serf, you can excrete fluids from all over your body. Here is how:

For those of us with money to burn—or, at least, to relentlessly heat up until the dead presidents start perspiring—check out Daphne in NoLIta, the fanciest little sweat shop on the Eastern seaboard. Daphne is so swanky, it's basically a caricature of a French salon (even though its ancestral roots are in Seattle). Jane Birkin and Serge Gainsbourg croon from an overhead stereo and tinctures with unintelligible names dot the reception wall. Behind it, fashionable people are sweating profusely, tucked into little infrared burritos, waiting for it to be over. This is you!

Infrared is the most effective kind of heating. Or so they claim. It's all about harnessing Far Infrared (FIR) waves, which are a form of light energy, and directing it at your body, where the light energy becomes heat energy once it penetrates your dermis. At Daphne, you're massaged down with body lotion (it feels incredible) and swaddled in a series of blankets, the top layer being the infrared blanket. Then you are convection-cooked for about 45 minutes.

It's important to note that sweating is boring and uncomfortable, especially at Daphne, where you have nothing but French music to occupy your mind for the duration of the sweat. (You can try to fall asleep, but good luck: Imagine falling asleep in a heated sleeping bag stuck on 150 degrees.) But you look amazing afterward. Your pores, which until now have been clutching fast to dirt and grime, release it into your sweat as a self-cleansing mechanism. And all that perspiration boosts full-body circulation, which is terrific for your heart and muscles. Daphne also claims that the session burns 1,500–3,000 calories—although I didn't leave with a six-pack. My face did look noticeably brighter for days, though. That's the power of sweat. It costs just $195 per 60-minute session.

If you're not into burning money but you have a comfortable amount of disposable income, there's Higher Dose, a boutique sauna experience with locations across New York. It costs a third of the price of an infrared body wrap, which is either a thrifty $65 well spent or $65 too much, depending on your worldview. Higher Dose's whole experience is customizable, from the soundtrack to the lighting scheme. At the SoHo location in the 11 Howard Hotel, each sauna is a literal hotel room, with its own private bathroom and mini fridge. Unlike at Daphne, you are welcome—and encouraged!—to listen to music that is not French, via a provided aux cord.

I don't know what the best music to sweat to for an hour is, so I opted for one long relaxing podcast while I lay in the sauna and experienced the unique terror of being teleported into a tropical-biome display at a zoo after hours. An hour is an awfully long time to sit in a small wooden box, but I swear, it flies by. After that, you're welcome to rinse off and head out. Take a coconut water with you. It's free!

Except when you leave, you continue to sweat for a little while. And while it could potentially be uncomfortable, as your merino sweater becomes thoroughly damp, it actually feels amazing. The other benefit of sweating is that it feels like you've been hooked up to an IV funneling pure, unfiltered endorphins into your bloodstream. Your body thinks you've just finished a vigorous hour-long workout, when in fact you've spent that time lying horizontally in a nice hotel room. (An added bonus: You sleep like the dead afterward. I was unconscious for a full 8 hours that night—the kind of heavy-body sleep that feels so good.) Sixty-five dollars, in my opinion, is a small price to pay for this level of satisfaction.

Higher Dose also allows couples to experience a 30- or 60-minute sweat, which seems to me like an extremely jarring but unexpected first date. Why not?

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