NextHeadline

The Path to (Muscular) Prosperity Week Six: The Workout for the One Percent

time:2025-02-06 05:53:10 Source: author:


This image may contain Paul Ryan Furniture Couch Sitting Human Person Clothing Apparel Screen and <strong></strong>Electronics
p90x-sept26-635[1].jpg

For a man who trumpets fiscal austerity from the hilltops, Paul Ryan uses a shockingly expensive ercise routine. That’s right, folks: P90X is a fantastic workout, but it ain’t cheap. To date, my bills total $981.92, and that doesn’t include all the ultra-tight tank tops I have to buy to showcase my ever-growing guns. Let’s take a look at how I spent so many bones, giving _GQ’_s business manager a heart attack in the process:

P90X DVDs from Amazon (next day delivery)..........174.77

P90X Results and Recovery formula (ninety day supply, rush delivery)..........176.88

Two Stamina Versa-Bell II Adjustable dumbbells..........$435.48

Polar FT4 Heart Rate Monitor..........$97.94

Altus push-up stands..........$16.32

Altus pull-up bar..........$32.65

Hugger-Mugger yoga mat..........$31.56

Hugger-Mugger yoga block..........$16.32

Keep in mind that New York sales tax is 8.875%, which is on the high side compared nationwide. (I mean, who the hell do these legislators think they are, taking my hard-earned money so they can fund their nanny state, amirite, Paul?) If you live somewhere like Delaware (no sales tax!), you may nudge that number down to the $950-or-less range. Did someone say, "bargain"?

When I signed up for this P90X project, I had no idea what the cost was; I just wanted abs like Tony Horton’s, minus the man breasts. Now that I’m halfway done with program—forty-five days down, forty-five more to go—I gotta consider: is P90X worth the price tag?

I’ll assume that none of you are part of the one percent, so the choice to dive headlong into Mr. Horton’s world of pain should not be taken lightly. Still my answer to whether or not it’s worth it is: yes, absolutely.

First of all, this thing whips you into shape faster than you ever would on your own, simply because of its daily intensity. And because the workouts are so varied, you’re using your whole body in a way that jogging and the occasional weight training session will not achieve.

Consider this: to lift serious weights on your own requires a gym membership, which in a place as expensive as New York City will run you $400 a year for the most bare-bones of set-ups. If you use P90X as your primary fitness program for two and half years, you haven’t lost a dime.

(I’m not suggesting you continue doing the routines every day ad infinitum, a sort of PX. Once finished with the first ninety days, begin a new regimen using the same workouts spread out over a longer period of time. This is in fact exactly what Tony Horton recommends.)

And for me, perhaps the number one reason to take on P90X is that I can roll out of bed, turn the TV on and begin. No packing up a workout bag and trudging off in the bracing morning air to a gym that no one wants to be at. No toweling off, throwing wrinkled pants and an oord shirt and rushing to the office. When I finish a DVD, my shower is ten steps away. I’m done ercising before I’m awake enough to fully comprehend how shitty it’s been.

Will you want to do this the rest of your life? No, you’ll probably get sick of it. But it’ll last you a few years. Sure, buying all the necessary goods may clean out your bank account, but remember: if Mitt moves into the White House and de-funds social welfare programs, effectively ripping your safety net out from under your feet, at least you’ll have jacked-up arms, legs, and abs. You just can’t put a price on transforming into an Übermensch.

Related Stories for GQPaul RyanPolitics

keyword:

Friendly link

copyright © 2023 powered by NextHeadline   sitemap