For the price of this thing, you could get several months’ worth of a gym membership. But does your gym feature encouraging words from the disembodied voice of Derrick Rose?

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Going back at least as far as Abs of Steel on good-old VHS, the fitness marketplace has used the gadgets of the day to convince us to ercise. Still, nothing prepared us for Adidas’ new $400 miCoach SMARTRUN touchscreen watch, which plans and tracks your workouts more effectively than most personal trainers. The watch is less James Bond than George Jetson, and it comes with a user manual as big as a phone book. I’ve tested dozens of flashy fitness watches from every brand under the sun—Nike, Garmin, Suunto, Timex, Polar—but without the directions, I was clueless.

At length you, the user, will realize that the miCoach is all wi-fi. That means no cords or cradles (Garmin’s cords are notoriously finicky). Just type in your wi-fi password and i’ll upload everything as soon as you step in the door from a workout. It’s not heavy or bulky, which you might expect from a watch with a flux capacitor.

The display screens are customizable online through Adidas’ companion website, also named miCoach. For those familiar with Nike+ Connect, it’s fairly similar. Want to see how far you’ve gone and how fast you’re running in one screen? Prefer to just see your heart rate and calories burned? You can have it your way, with up to three screens (just swipe to get to the next one) and four sets of data on each. And miCoach makes it easy—choose your settings online and then simply press the sync button on the watch. A built-in training log shows everything you’ve done for the week in a nice bar graph_. _

Once you’re actually working out, you will be greeted with a menacing color scheme. The heart rate monitor is _in _the watch (so none of those goofy chest straps), and anytime your heart rate gets up above the 170 threshold, all the numbers on the watch turn red—this timepiece knows when you are sucking wind.

If you’re trying to get in shape for, say, a local 5k or your upcoming 3-on-3 tournament, miCoach has loads of different training programs, from football to basketball to rugby (seriously). They’re easy to follow and an excellent way to find a workout program that fits into your schedule. Pick the training regimen—want to build lean mass and get more explosive?—and then simply follow along on your wrist.

Some of the workouts necessitate gym equipment, but many of them you could do in your apartment (think: planks, lunges, air squats). All of the workouts have video examples that show up _on the watch. _There’s four gigs of space, plenty of room for your favorite jams. You’ll have to spring for some new Bluetooth headphones, though—there’s no headphone jack.

Those who spring for the headphones will be treated to words of encouragement from a "coach," whose voice chimes in at specific intervals to offer words of advice or remind you your heart rate is off the charts. You have your choice of coach, which amounts to picking your favorite athlete with a fat Adidas contract: tennis star Andy Murray, Reggie Bush, Derrick Rose, even (for the Spanish speakers out there) Atletico Madrid striker David Villa.

Bill Bradley is a columnist at Next City. Follow him on Twitter @billbradley3.

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